Just so you know

I just put up new pictures on the flickr account from Ella's 4th Birthday Party and some new pics of Baby Cate. Also there is a new (by new I mean I wrote it Monday) below. To check out the pictures go to www.flickr.com/photos/cantrellkids

love yall

Hard to Believe

As I sit and listen to the noise of a baby swing going back and forth and the sound of little feet running upstairs, with the occasion scream, both from my wife and my other two deliquents, trying to wrestle them into the bath tub, my heart is at peace with the world. Well, Baby Cate turned a month old on Friday. It doesn't feel real, since she has only been home for 2 weeks. She is adjusting FINE to the craziness in our house. Yesterday (Sunday), I was cooking some deer meat for my family to feast on and she was in the kitchen in her swing screaming, at the top of her little lungs, nothing was wrong, she was crying, hungry, dirty, nope, just screaming for the sake of screaming, all DNA testing that I thought about went out the window at that moment, I knew that that was a "pure D" Cantrell kid. She really has been doing very well, she is eating well, sleeping well, well any parents out there know that the word "well" is completely relative and changes tremendously when you become a parent. She seems to be gaining weight, don't know for sure, just because we do not have a scale here, who needs one, they just stress you out anyway. She really is just a great baby, the kind of baby I like, can't move, sleeps alot, doesn't talk back, and eats whatever you stick in their mouth, without complaints. I wish all kids stayed that way, till 21, now there's an idea, I might start a novena for that one. But, seriously, Cate is really doing well, it seems. We go back to the Dr. next week, so I will be updating you on her condition again soon. Ok, so what most of you come here for besides Cate. I seriously get so many comments about our family, and I do not make any of it up, it is to good to make up, and I am a pretty creative person.
The other night we were at a surprise birthday party for a friend of Ali and mine, when Ella asked if she could go to the potty, I said sure let's go. We are sitting in the bathroom, Ella, taking care of business and I am sitting on a stool, when she looks at me and said, " You know Dad, I love these shoes, this skirt, and this shirt together" at that moment I realized that I was going to broke in the next few years, I have a daughter who is EXTREMELY fashion conscious, at FOUR, and another one who came out costing more than my house, just kidding.
Dude, has taking a liking to his sister, one that we must watch CAREFULLY. He has this wooden sword that my mother-in-law, GOD BLESS HER, I love you Cheryl, bought him at the ripe old age of 2. Now, I realize that the many books I have read on raising boys and the masculine heart are true. We found our son the other day, stabbing his ONE MONTH OLD sister with his sword, saying, "I kill Baby Cate," people, we don't watch violent cartoons or movies or regular tv for that matter, I have never threatened to "kill anyone," I might say "damn" every now and then but, I have not been known to threaten to "kill" people, so I have NO idea where he gets this stuff.
Dude was running through the house the other day with his toy gun, yes he has toy guns, he is a boy. Going BANG BANG, Ella and I were sitting on the couch watching this fiasco and I asked Ella, "Ella, what do you think he is shooting at?" She responsed saying, "Deer, daddy, he is shooting deer. I like to eat deer. Sure wish you would kill one soon" Yes, my four year old gave a serious shot to my pride as a deer hunter. So this past weekend I finally killed a deer, brought the head, only the head home. The kids come running to the back door to see the spoils that daddy has brought home. Daddy, is proud of his kill, to which my loving daughter says, "Daddy, that is a small deer, sure wish you would kill a big one" Typical woman, NEVER SATISFIED, they are hard wired from birth, just like little boys.
Final one, then I have to call it a night. I get home the other day and am greeted by the usual screams of, "Daddy's home!" Give hugs and kisses, they go back to playing, Ali and I are chatting in the kitchen, when I see Dude pass heading towards the laundry room, no big deal, nothing sharp, deadly, poisoness, or bone breaking in there, so Ali and I continue talking, after a few minutes I notice its pretty quiet in there. I proceed to the laundry room to find our cat eating quietly out of her bowl and our son, laying down on his belly, licking the water out of her bowl. To which Ali and I did the good responsible thing, laughed, to which he thought was funny, therefore it will happen again! Well, my wife just yelled that my son is peeing down the stairs.
If Baby Cate can survive here, no heart defect will even have even the remotest effect on her! Well, until next time, thank you again for the continued gifts that have flowed into our house and all the thoughts and prayers. We love yall!

Dr.'s Appt Update 11/30/2007

Good afternoon to all! Well, Baby Cate had her first cardiologist appointment on Wednesday as many of you know and were praying for. She is doing great! She gained 5oz in a week which Dr. Dalal was pleased with. They did an EKG and the results came back good. They did not do an echocardiogram because the dr. did not feel it necessary because of her progress. Her blood oxygen levels were in the mid to high 90's with a 100 being the highest it can be. She said that Cate's heart seems to be adjusting well as she continues to grow and that we would not have to go back for another visit for 3 weeks, as long as Cate behaves herself. The visit was a big relief for her mom and I, just to know that after being home for a week, in our crazy house, that Cate was doing well. It is surpising that she is doing as well as she is due to the fact that she is constantly harrassed by her older siblings. Her brother stood in front of her swing yesterday in his spiderman halloween costume screaming at her to see if he could get a rise, but he eventually gave up and went on to terrorize our pour cat, who is going straight to kitty heaven for all she puts up with so patiently from him. Just a couple of funny Cantrell kid stories, mainly cause they make me laugh. Our parents were at the house for thanksgiving and my mother-in-law was tell us the story of when they had taken the Ella and Dude to Seasame Street and then had a picnic afterward. Ella and Dude were running around playing chase and Ella tripped and fell. She quickly responded, "Awe Damit" my mother-in-law very calmly repsonded, "Ella, that is not a very nice word for a pretty little girl like you to say," to which Ella quickly fired back, "Well, Nana, sometimes when I say that word, people laugh." Well, the sunday after thanksgiving was the typical lazy sunday around the Cantrell house. The kids were watch cartoons and Ali and I were in the kitchen having coffee and chatting. I yelled in to the kids, "Five minutes and the TV goes off," then we hear a sweet little voice say, "Awe Damit," to which Ali and I did quietly laugh, I called Ella into the kitchen and said, "Ella, you really should not use that word, its not very nice," and she said, "Well, Dad, neither should you when you are talking on the phone." I said well, your right Daddy shouldn't say that word. KIDS! I picked "Dude" up from the Babysitters on wednesday afternoon, he loves to ride in "Daddy's Big Truck." He rolls the window up and down, up and down. He had gotten quiet back there so I turn around to see what he was up to and he had my cd case open on the side of him and was pressing two cds tightly to his ears, I would guess to see if he could hear them. When he realized that they were not working, he quickly decided to despose of them and flung them both out the window. Now, I don't know how many "broken" ones he had found before I notice what he was doing and rolled up his window and locked it. That's my boy, if its broken, throw it away! Well, yall stay tuned more to come. Until next time, watch what you say on the phone and don't let dude near your cd collections.

A little Reminder

Good Afternoon to all who are still tuned in to the Baby Cate blog. I wanted to remind everyone that tomorrow is Baby Cate's first Cardiologist Appointment. And to ask all who have loved her this far in prayer, that you would continue to pray for her and that everything goes well tomorrow. Our hope is, well for a complete miraculous healing, but will gladly accept that she is growing well, her heart is continuing to balance itself out and that she is gaining weight. As I look at that little girl with those big blue eyes looking up trying to figure out what that blurry blob is in front of her, I can't help but wonder, as any concerned parent does or would, is she going to be alright? It is not a matter of having faith, but just the human element of life, the experience of fear, concern, and the genuine desire for the well being of our little girl. On the outside, there appears to be nothing wrong, she eats well, she looks pink and beautiful, she sleeps, poops, and cries just like any other baby. It’s just the mental fact that we know something is not "normal" that causes me to look at EVERY little thing she does and ask, Is she ok? should she be breathing like that? Why did her Eyes get big like that? She only at 2 ounces and not 3. That was a BIG poop, is that normal, are you tired now? So many questions and concerns fill my big ole head, things that I NEVER paid attention to with my other two children, but now I feel the need to watch her like she is on the verge of flat lining at any second, which she is not, so take a deep breath. Take a deep breath, that's it, that is what I and we all, must do as we are faced with situations like this or one you might be facing right now. I don't want to be some freakishly overly protective parent, I feel bad enough that I am the wash your hands police, when people come to my house. I don't want Baby Cate to grow up thinking she is breakable, I want her to grow up strong, determined, and unafraid. Unafraid of obstacles and challenges that life throws in our path, notice I said life, not God, I don't believe that God gave Cate this heart condition, it just happens. I want her to eat dog poop like her brother, I want her take off her clothes and play rain puddles, I want her to run around the back yard singing songs to people who no one else sees, except her and have cool names like schocakan. But it all must start with Taking a Breath, not being such a worry wort, but just letting her be. She will learn how to face life from me and her mom. I want to teach her that with God’s grace we can face anything, we peace and true joy. I want her to know that she is not in anyway an underdog or weak, but even more to instill in her that she has fought valiantly since the day she was born. To be honest with or without a heart condition if she survives our house, and by house I mainly mean, her older brother and sister, she will be FINE! So, as we prepare for her first Cardiologist Appointment tomorrow at 2:30, please pray for her, and for her mom and dad, that we can relax, let her be the beautiful baby that God has created her to be, and to know, one day, she will eat dog poop, and be a better kid for it. I will update yall after the appointment tomorrow. Until next time, don't forget to breath.

Sounds of Joy 11/14/2007

Good Morning to all, I have gotten a couple of "complaints" that there has not been a blog in a few days, so I thought I would give you guys an update on the Cantrell Family and their newest addition. Yes, the sounds of little cries fill the house as Baby Cate makes her prescense and her needs known to us. These little cries are usually followed by the sounds of little footsteps running to "meet" her her every "need." Ella and "Dude" have adjusted very well to their new little sister. They have taken on the roles of "provider," well I guess you can call it that. They want to hold her OFTEN, but it is kind of nice, because when they hold her they are STILL & QUIET, actually quiet. A feat I thought impossible for these two usually crazy kids. Dude, is the one that we have to watch the closest because of his constant "concern" for his little sister. He makes sure that the little ducks on her swing are CONSTANTLY spinning, he must have an internal alarm that goes off when they stop, because the moment they do he comes running from where ever he is in the house to minimize the time that ducks are not spinning. Now, with that said, we must keep an ever so close eye on our eager little servant. .In the span of one hour on Thanksgiving day, I found a large wooden Tonka wrecker truck hanging from her spinning ducks, RIGHT OVER HER LITTLE HEAD, I guess he thought, she might want something different to look at. Next, the swing had stopped and he knew how to fix that problem, by pushing her swing as hard as he could, because, according to him "she likes to go high." And finally I found him standing on a bar stool, leaning over her swing, fiddling with the buttons on the top, because they weren't working to his liking. Ella, on the other hand, is simply enamered by her little sister, and just thinks she is, and I quote, "darling." The two of them have really been such a joy to watch as they get acclimated to their new little sister.
Ali and I are doing well. We also, have been getting used to the sounds of little cries and many dirty diapers. Cate is truly a great Baby, she is sleeping about 3 to 4 hours a night and eating very well. We got more good news on Thanksgiving morning. Dr. Dave, Baby Cate's Neonatologist called with her chromosonal tests and they all came back normal. So, all questions of Down's Syndrome or Turner's Syndrome have been answered when her chromosonal test came back with no abnormalities. So, the only thing we need to focus on is the issues with her heart.
Ali and I again want to reiterate our gratitude to all of you have cooked dinners, sent gift cards and other financial gifts. It has truly been overwhelming to see the love and support outpoured on our little family. And just a reminder we are in the planning stages of something to celebrate Baby Cate's life and the community that she has been born into. I hope that for all of you, your Thanksgiving was filled with joy, peace, and happiness, this year will be one I won't forget for a long time to come. I am thankful for all of you and will be updating the Blog soon, so I do not get threats again. We love you and thank God for you!

Enjoying the Moment 11/19/2007

Good Evening to All, although at this time in the evening most sane people would be snuggled up in their beds, which I am, just not sleeping. I just got off the phone with Baby Cate's night shift nurse, as we do every night around this time, just to check in, see how much she weight she gained, how much she ate in the afternoon. But, that is the last time I will have to make that call. Tomorrow, our little girl wll be home. Home for Thanksgiving, truly one of the most thankful thanksgivings we have ever had, I tear up as I am writing this because of unbelievable beginning of this journey and the indescribale the outpouring of support and love we have had on our little famly, and the fact that tomorrow, our little girl will be home, home to be loved, physically by her Mother, Father, Sister, and Brother. I got two comments on the Blog today, from two people who do not know us or the journey we have been on, but who God has allowed to stumble upon the path that so many of you have joined us in walking on. I do not know how to put into words what it feels like as a Father to hear the outpouring of such love and compasion for your child. I am not really sure if I have ever felt or experienced such an event. It has truly been for myself and my wife a life altering experience, and to know this is only the beginning is inexplicable. If you will humor me, I want to share with you all something that I felt God put, said, placed, however you want to say it on my heart as I sat in Mass yesterday. The Gospel reading spoke of not worrying about the future and what is to come. The priest began his homily by saying, "If you want to make God laugh, tell Him your plans." He proceed to go on to tell the congregation that we, as human beings, spend so much of our time worrying about the "future", our next vacation, our children's college funds, our retirement and that we so often lose sight of the moment. The moment, is what God is so present in, the moment that is right now, because truly that moment is what we have. As I reflected on Baby Cate's short life, that began not even two weeks ago, I think of all the scenerios that have run through my head, and how I am already planning for her first, second, and third heart surgeries, when she is not even home yet. We have not even begun to experience life with her here, in our own home. I was reminded so gently, to slow down, enjoy the moments that we are having with her, whether it is just her and I in the quiet morning NICU snuggled face to face or just sitting beside her and Ali, as she cuddles close to her mother as she nurses. These are the moments that past, unbenouced, unfiltered, yet unforgetable. Its in these times, that I am not worrying about her college fund or how we will pay for heart surgeries, its the other twenty-two hours a day that I need to bring my heart back to the fact that we are under the watchful eye of our God, who loves us emencly and knows our every move, thought, concern, and fear. The communion hymn in Mass yesterday, "Be Not Afraid," the refrain is, "Be not afraid, I go before you always, come follow me, and I will give you rest." As I heard these sweet prophetic words I was brought back to the day Baby Cate was born and the words that God spoke to my heart, "Do not be Afraid." It was an affirmation, or more of a reminder, that He has Baby Cate in His hands and that He knows that plans that he has made for her, and that we, Ali and I, must not worry about the future, but enjoy every moment that we have with her, our other two beautiful children, and each other. With that being said, on the eve of our little girl coming home, we begin a new journey, a one of embracing each day, not in fear, but in the peace of knowing that our loving God is with us, in our family, and with us in the community He has blessed us with in all of you. Our other two holigans are very exicted to meet there new little sister, and we are excited to bring her home, home to a family that is ready, as much as we can be today, to embrace this journey, and home to a community that has been lifting her up to the throne room of God. This journey is not over, it is only a new chapter in story of Baby Cate, a chapter that we are eagerly waiting to turn the page and to see what is in the pages to come. This is not the end of the Blog, and I hope you will stay tuned, believe me, the Cantrell family has always been interested, we just have never really publicly pronouced it as we have over the past two weeks, but even more now with a new little one, who will bring her own story and flare to our already crazy lives, I can only imagine it will only continue to get funnier. Baby Cate weighed in at 7.1 lbs tonight, her original birth weight, thats my girl!!!! As I said before Baby Cate already has her first Cardiologist appointment scheduled and Dude, her big brother as already tried out her baby swing and realized its not as cool when your feet drag on the floor and that the little ducks that hang over your head, really do not taste that great. We have some plans in the making for all of you who have continued to follow Baby Cates progress to join us, her family, in the celebration of her life, and as I said, this Blog is no where near over, only a new chapter, so please keep reading because there will be news very soon, on how you can be a part of Baby Cate's life. We love you all an are extremely grateful for each and every one of you. God Bless and Good night and remember, enjoy the moments, becuase its all we have.

A little bit of Back Story

As Ali and I talked over coffee this morning about Baby Cate's Blog, Ali mentioned that many of you have joined the story midway through, in a way. She said that she wanted you all to know what a journey and what a fighter Baby Cate has been since her conception. So here is a little flash back for you to the beginning of this story. It has been a real journey of Faith for our family. When Ali was about 12 weeks pregnant we went to the Dr. for a normal check up and ultra sound. As we stood looking at the alien like figure on the screen, our hearts filled with joy, its little hearts was beating, Ali and I squeezed each others hand and smiled. The ultrasound tech then asked us if Ali had been sick or if our kids had been sick. Either one of them hadn't been, the ultrasound tech told us that the baby appeared to have "high drops" which is a condition that occurs from the baby being exposed to a virus. Fluid had gathered around the brain and she told us that babies who had this condition typically terminate or miscarry around five month. Our joy turned quickly to sorrow. We went that day to see a specialist who confirmed that there were some issues and at around 16 weeks we would be able to see have an amniosentisis to determine more definitively what was going on. Ali and I left the Dr.'s office and cried, talked and prayed. For the first time I think I began to truly learn what surrender meant. I had talked about it time and time again, but I never really could wrap my head around what it truly meant. That day began our journey into embracing surrender. A dear friend that we had talked to brought over a third class relic, a prayer candle, and a novena book of Blessed Francis Xavier Seelos. I had never heard of him, but our friend swore by his intercession. Ali, being a very devout person to the Saints intercession began asking Fr. Seelos to pray for our unborn child. Blessed Seelos worked as a redemptris priest here in Louisiana at a parish in New Orleans and there is a Shrine where his bones lay in repose there. Our friend Andrea said that we had to visit the shrine and pray with the cross that holds a relic of Blessed Seelos, so we did. It was an amazing experience and we continued to pray for his intercession. God spoke to Ali and I telling us that the amniocentisis was not necessary, that we must believe in his providence for us and our baby. So, we did, we declined to have the amnio and continued praying. With each Dr.'s visit the baby grew and things looked better and better. Around five months the dr. told us that the baby no longer had a chance of miscarrying and that the fluid around the head was gone and that we would be welcoming a little girl into our family. The last visit six month, everything looked Great! Even the Dr. said, "Guys, we may be looking at a Miracle here!" It has been a journey for sure, one I don't think I would do any other way. I have learned to truly trust in God's voice in our life, marriage, and even as he spoke through our children. I have also learned the powerful intercession of the Saints in heaven, who are there to pray on our behalf. We will name the baby Catherine Francis, after Fr. Francis Seelos. I encourage you to look up info on Fr. Seelos, and ask his intercession for your intentions. He was an awesome humble priest who used to sleep on the pew of the Church in case anyone came during the night for assistance he would be there to help them. I thank all of you who have prayed for us and continue to pray for us and our little girl and I thank Fr. Fancis Seelos for his constant prayer for our little girl. Below you will find the regular update for today titled "Oh Happy Day." Blessed Francis Xavier Seelos, Pray for us.